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[Intro]
[Verse 1]
Well the farmer prayed for a better year
And the crops were good like the Lord did hear
But his barn burnt down with winter near
The answer came in white and black
In the farmer's almanac it says
If a man could have half his wishes he could double his trouble
A sweet old lady was eighty four
When her kinfolks came for a month or more
Now from overworked she's on the other shore
Much too late with ya'll come back
And it says in the farmer's almanac it says
Visitors and fish smell after 3 days
[Verse 2]
Our leader was a silver-tongued man
He deceived the people of the land
And when he got caught he couldn't stand
It's a little off-beat and a little off-track
But it says in the farmer's almanac it says
In rivers and bad government the lightest things float to the top
[Verse 3]
Rod said I don't believe in God
Rod died and lies beneath the sod
Well God did not believe in Rod
Life is a troubled and a wearied track
But it says in the farmer's almanac it says
Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death
[Verse 4]
The little boy followed the honey bee
And it flew straight to the honey tree
He got stung but got the honey free
Consolation for the things you lack
Is in the farmer's almanac it says
God gives us the darkness so we can see the stars
[Verse 5]
He came home 3 hours late from work
Said "I had a flat and fell in the dirt"
She said "and got lipstick on your shirt"
Well it turned out like Jill and Jack
And it says in the farmer's almanac it says
Lies have to be covered up truth can run around naked
[Verse 6]
He said honey you know I'm true
I just look at other women that's all I do
Then she caught him with her best friend Peggy Sue
Sometimes some women will look back
And it says in the farmer's almanac it says
There is a lot of difference in window-shoppin' and shop-liftin'
[Verse 7]
I sat down at a shoe-shine stand
I had a real slow shoe-shine man
I said you don't pop that rag like some of 'em can
He looked at me and then he said right back
"It says in the farmer's almanac it says
The trouble with the world today is there's too much poppin' and not enough shinin'"
[Outro]
